Holy balls, is it really August already? Hot pockets! Where the hell have I been? What the shit Happened to BATTLE ZOO?!

Fear not dear readers, for I have been impossibly hard at work on a major acquisition/big time corporate money buy type of thing.

In other words.. I BOUGHT A GUM COMPANY!

Well, not any gum company, the Glorp gum company!

Back in January I acquired the defunct Glorp Gum Brand. I always loved Glorp gum as a kid, and am looking forward to getting the company back up on its feet. I’ve got a lot of exciting things planned for GLORP. Including reissuing lots of great old Glorp gum products.

To start with, I’ve 4 Classic GLORP Gum shirts, Glorpoid trading cars, Vintage Glorp gum machine sticker sets, Old school Metallic button sets, and even a hat!

What is Glorp gum you ask? Aren’t you Tired of your gum not coming with a free T-shirt? Well, the Glorp Gum family of products is here to help! Each and every piece of our hand crafted “aged to perfection” bubble gum comes with a high quality limited edition T-shirt. So when you think of gum, think of GLORP! America’s CHEW value!

So step on over to right now and check out the stuff!

Here’s a vintage Glorp Gum commercial I dug up on you tube: